Haters Prove You Right
Everybody has experienced haters at some point in their life and
it’s essential to learn how to deal with them.
Not only they are not going to go away, but chances are that as we move forward in life we are going to encounter more and more.
Following the recent events of Dr. Jordan Peterson on social media, I’ve noticed an increasing number of negative comments.
Dr. Peterson has some polarizing vision on certain aspects of life and this has brought him a great share of following, but also a fair share of haters.
I’ve been following his work for a while now, followed his tips such as the now meme Clean Your Room and read 12 Rules for Life.
He has inspired me to try to overcome my fear of being on camera and other aspects of my life. I don’t agree with everything he says, but he always puts forward interesting thought-provoking arguments.
So I was naturally curious if he’s indeed a fraud or not, based on the hate that he’s receiving.
He’s currently facing a med addiction due to depression for his wife’s terminal cancer.
It’s interesting to see that during this period his Haters have been way more active and brutal than usual.
This made me reflect greatly on why now and what’s the difference between constructive criticism and a Hater.
Difference between Constructive Criticism and Hatred
It’s very important to understand the difference between the two and not discard any form of criticism as hatred.
Constructive criticism is essential feedback, that highlights flaws in our thinking or character.
It allows us to reevaluate and improve ourselves.
It’s really easy to recognize because when you ask the person why is he saying so, they’ll have no trouble dissecting the issue and point out the blind spots in your thinking.
Then you can evaluate whether to act upon it or not.
Hatred, on the other hand, comes from a totally different place.
It’s more often than not emotional and with no good intent.
But who is a Hater?
The dictionary gives us this definition:
Informal. a person who thrives on showing hate toward, criticizing, or belittling other people or things, usually unfairly:The guy is just a hater, looking for a fight.
Dictionary definition
A Hater is someone that harshly criticize you or your opinions based on their own emotions and point of view.
This could be due to a number of reasons, but their end goal is to persuade you not to do something or belittling you in front of others and bring you down.
In the case of Dr. Peterson’s haters, they were really easy to recognize.
I’ve read the comments carefully to see if he’s indeed a fraud, but I was glad to find out that there was nothing in there.
The haters didn’t bring any valid arguments to the table but just limiting themselves to mocking him and hateful comments.
They’ve been doubling down on their hostility towards him now because he’s sick and weak.
Only cowards go after a person that is facing his wife’s cancer and depression.
But this is what they really are, just cowards shouting through their keyboards, instead of facing their inner demons.
By listening to him talking about how he met his wife, it’s clear that the man still loves her after so many years of marriage. Which is very inspiring and rare in the modern-day of unhappy marriages and divorces.
An unexpected event like this would bring any man to his knees.
Internet trolls are easy to dismiss, but when it comes to someone close or a family member. A lot of people stop chasing their dream and aspiration, because of that.
So, it’s very important to learn how to face them and get rid of the negativity.
So how to deal with them?
Due to their irrational nature, there’s not much benefit in arguing with them on the issue.
But depending on what role they play in your life, there are different ways to go about it:
- Strangers on social media: straight-up block them, you don’t need that kind of negativity. The internet is infested with trolls.
- An acquaintance: if they are not important to you, just cut them off.
- A coworker: this is tricky because you have to see them every day. It’s better to reduce the interactions with them and avoid the topics where you disagree. This is in order to avoid negativity in the workspace, which can get quite heavy.
- A close person or relative: oh boy, this is certainly the most difficult to deal with. It’s important to explain to them in a calm way why you’re doing what you’re doing.
If they are reasonable and truly love you, they will accept it. Otherwise, you have to start seriously considering whether to keep them close or put some distance in between you.
Why haters prove you right
Most people live a comfortable life and don’t take action that they know they should.
Instead, they take the easy route, make excuses and keep on living their lives on autopilot.
When people like Dr. challenges their limiting believes, they get angry and try at all costs to take him down.
This is because if he’s right, their metal card castle of delusions will fall apart, leaving them with no excuses.
We shouldn’t fall for their failures, but instead, take it as a sign that we’re indeed doing something valuable here.
So keep on griding my friend, the truth always prevails at the end.
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